random thoughts for those who ponder God

there are moments and days when i am caught up in the miraculous bliss of being fully alive, as if i am sensing God so clearly that my skin wants to burst in ravenous hunger for more. i am finding those days are truly gifts, but they are not meant to seduce me into believing this experience is the only joy i should seek as an authentication that God is alive. in fact, it is when 99% of my days are spent slogging through the mud of my own internal junk that i am called to learn another aspect of joy--gratitude in pain and love in brokenness. that is a joy that is arrived at without any particular circumstance. it is simple joy because whether i feel Him or not i know He accepts me in the midst of the slimy pit of my faults.

though i may have times with my Messiah where He lifts me up effortlessly into His presence, my true calling is to lift Him up--even in felt absence--because He has created me and reclaimed me. either way, amazingly it seems to be He who provides me the courage (and energy) to enter into worship--the sense, search and service of God. and sometimes from Him, through Him and to Him my spirit can soar whether blissfully or brokenly.

1 comment:

bev said...

I've actually thought about this a lot lately and couldn't agree more. Even when life isn't easy, and we feel broken (whether due to our own internal junk, or broken for the pains of others in this world)we are in better places overall, knowing Him. Showing "gratitude in pain and love in brokenness"

Here's to those 1% days when life is full and hungry at the same time.

Followers